Living in the wilderness

So many people, when they see me with my large family, assume that I'm some kind of super mom. They often think that because I homeschool with such a large brood I must be really organized and have it all together. It simply is not true. I'm always busy, sometimes overwhelmed, and often tired. There are many little people who need my love, patience, and attention. When family and strangers comment that they don't know how I do it my first thought is "If you only knew...." Of course there are times when things are going well and I'm on the mountaintop spiritually. But other times, like now, I find myself in a dry and thirsty land.....the wilderness. When you are in a spiritual wilderness and feel like none of your prayers are being answered, it can make caring for many seem all the more difficult.

For the past few years I have seen more valleys than peaks and it sometimes seems there is no end in sight. There have been many types of struggles in my life lately and I can't seem to quiet the storm some days no matter how much I pray and seek the Lord. God has been faithful through it all, often coming through just when I thought I couldn't hang on for another minute. Am I blessed? Absolutely. Am I struggling? Absolutely.

Yesterday the Lord led me to a passage of scripture that I can meditate on while I'm in the valley. As my pastor often says - "He showed up right on time, with just enough" to get me through again.....

• ¹⁷Although the fig tree shall not blossom, neither shall fruit be in the vines; the labour of the olive shall fail, and the fields shall yield no meat; the flock shall be cut off from the fold, and there shall be no herd in the stalls: ¹⁸Yet I will rejoice in the LORD, I will joy in the God of my salvation. Habakkuk 3:17-18